a thing we call easter

I am not an avid holiday celebrate-er. I wouldn't even know which holiday is my favorite. I recently realized I do not really care for decorations. Actually I sort of have this passionate distaste for them right now. I hate the little nicknacks that say "easter", or the different hand towels for different seasons, or the statues of santa that sit around. The only exception to this that I have found, is the simple decorations of christmas at my parents house. To me that feels like home. But more than anything, what i enjoy about holidays is the excuse for family. The excuse to lay around, together, with nothing else on the agenda. But, this easter holiday I did not spend time with anyone I am related too. Actually, I worked all afternoon, so in many ways it seemed to be just another day. I did however have a wonderful easter meal with two of my most favorite people in life. And though it was not my mom, or my home, it felt like time with family. Maybe home really does have something to do with your heart, and the people it lies with. Maybe family really is more than my nucleus of five with whom I share my genes. Maybe family are those around me, those whom i share life with and who sow into my life each day. In so many ways, I have one great family. 

As for easter, there is nothing too exciting about this day. I really like hard boiled eggs. And I do find some thrill in looking around the yard for something hidden (yes, still). And you know its a damn good day when you find the "golden egg". But, easter isn't some "religious holiday" to me. I do not feel like it is a Sunday that I need to be at church more than any other. It is definitely not about church, and it is definitely not about the eggs. But in my faith, through all my questioning, in all the things that I can barely grip, in all the things that I am not sure I believe- the thing that I love the most about the God I believe in, is that He is alive. He is real to me. He is a companion through all my days. People always talk about Jesus dying. My most favorite thing, is that He is still living. I know I have said it before, but I really do find that I can rise because He has risen. Somewhere in the midst of pain, I find a peace and a strength in knowing a living God. 

and so i celebrate.