I am alone, surrounded by
The color blue
Inside a poem, the only
Words i ever knew
Washing my hands, of the
Many years untold
For now i am banned, my
Future is to unfold
Alone, inside a poem... washing my hands of the years... future to unfold..
I like that. I am there. I dont know why. but the way this sounds, seems like a bad place, a hard place. I feel a little ashamed. Like this is not the right place to be. But a man just said to me the other day, " there is more gray in the world than there is black and white." and you know- I agree. Its not about one right or wrong. Its about finding a way that works for me. Its about the journey. and fucking up. and getting up. and making a way. and seeing the flower. and feeling the breeze. and having a conversation. and fucking up. and continuing forward. and learning the beauty in the fuck up. that maybe its not so bad after all. because even surrounded by the color blue, the future will unfold.
6 comments:
"Its not about one right or wrong. Its about finding a way that works for me." - Not sure that I agree with this perspective. If life is "about finding a way that works for ME," then the purpose in all that you do is self-serving. You life purpose then does not lend itself toward truly enjoying people as you say that you have recently learned to do in a previous post about your sister. What happens when whatever "works for you" changes and that does not include seeing your sister in the same way? Do you stop appreciating her? Do you move on?
How is life every really going to make sense if the way that you orientate yourself is always changing? It is like trying to hit a pinata blindfolded after being on a merry-go-round.
well one thing I have surely learned is that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, and most everyone gives it even without being asked. So, you are entitled to your thoughts. Why don't you just try writing them on your own blog.
I am surely not asking you to adopt my perspective and understand that all are entitled to their opinions. In addition, I am not trying to say that you are wrong and looking to give advice, but merely providing an alternate perspective.
I hope that you were not offended by my sentiments and apologize if you were. I enjoy reading your thoughts and assumed that commenting would be an appropriate way to interact.
Hi Quinn: I recently found your blog (via your FACEBOOK page). I think your writing is beautiful, insightful, brave, mature. I think that this person completely misread what you were writing about. I did not "read" this particular blog as self-serving at all & esp. after reading many of your other pages could I imagine ANYONE think you look at life in a self-serving way. Everyone must find a way to make life work for them or they would be unable to give to the world. By now, I'm sure you are over this, but I JUST HAD TO give my two cents worth esp. since I have been so moved by your writing and the way you look at the world. I wish you were still our neighbor so I could have spent more time watching you (and your sibs) grow up.
Love, Elizabeth (yr. Petaluma neighbor)
BTW - this date, March 17th is Scott's and my anniversary (and also the date my Dad had died). My parents had a wonderful marriage, so when we ran off to Hawaii to get married we picked March 17th as I thought it was my parents' anniversary. After we were married I got a message from my sister that I had confused their anniversary (March 13th) w/the day our Dad died. I KNEW that date was important and when I first realized my mistake for a moment I was horrified & felt as though I had been stabbed clear through my heart. Then I realized that this day would now bring memories of both my father and my wedding and it turned this day of pain into one of happy memories.
thank you for your very kind words Elizabeth!
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